Love is the second principle of personal development. Obviously love is an emotion, but it’s also much more than that. One of the fundamental choices you face in every encounter is the choice to approach or avoid. You can try to connect with people, or you can pull away from them. You can immerse yourself in your day’s work, or you can procrastinate. You can approach any person, place, or thing with the intention to connect, or you can remain aloof and keep your distance. The decision to connect is the essence of love.
Sometimes love arises spontaneously. You may feel a certain affinity for a person, place, or activity without knowing why. For some reason, you just perceive a strong connection. Maybe you meet someone new and have a sense you’re going to become friends. Maybe you have a special fondness for playing the guitar, or perhaps you feel a soulful connection to a certain place. You might not always know why such feelings arise, but forming connections is clearly an integral part of human life. You could even go so far as to say that it’s the very reason why we’re here.
Every day you’re compelled to make connection decisions. By your actions you decide what to link up with and what to avoid. Will you talk to your spouse or connect with the television? Will you take your next vacation at a favorite spot or go someplace new this time? Will you bond with a pet or go to a party? Whenever you choose to make one connection, you simultaneously choose not to connect with all of the other possibilities.
If you want to grow consciously, you must deliberately decide which connections you’ll strengthen and which you’ll allow to weaken. Such choices ultimately determine the shape of your life. In the long run, your life becomes a reflection of what you choose to connect with most often. When you feel good about your connections, you come into greater alignment with the principle of love.
In addition to connection, there are two other major aspects of love: communication and communion.
* Source: Personal Development for Smart People by Steve Pavlina