Circumstances are what deceive us—you must be discerning in them. We embrace evil before good. We desire the opposite of what we once desired. Our prayers are at war with our prayers, our plans with our plans.
—Seneca, Moral Letters, 45.6
A woman says she wants to meet a nice guy and get married—yet she spends all her time around jerks. A man says that he wishes he could find a great job, but he hasn’t actually bothered to do the looking. Business executives try to pursue two different strategies at the same time—straddling it’s called—and they are shocked when they succeed at neither.
All of these people, just as is often true for us too, are deceived and divided. One hand is working against the other. As Martin Luther King Jr. once put it, “There is something of a civil war going on within all of our lives,” a war inside each individual between the good parts of their soul and the bad.
The Stoics say that that war is usually a result of our conflicting desires, our screwed-up judgments or biased thoughts. We don’t stop and ask: OK, what do I really want? What am I actually after here? If we did, we’d notice the contradictory and inconsistent wishes that we have. And then we’d stop working against ourselves.
* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman