Remember, then, if you deem what is by nature slavish to be free, and what is not your own to be yours, you will be shackled and miserable, blaming both gods and other people. But if you deem as your own only what is yours, and what belongs to others as truly not yours, then no one will ever be able to coerce or to stop you, you will find no one to blame or accuse, you will do nothing against your will, you will have no enemy, no one will harm you, because no harm can affect you.
—Epictetus, Enchiridion, 1.3
After Captain James Stockdale was shot down over Vietnam, he endured seven and a half years in various prison camps. He was subjected to brutal torture but always struggled to resist. Once, when his captors intended to force him to appear in a propaganda video, he purposely and severely injured himself to make that impossible.
When Stockdale’s plane was hit, he told himself that he was “entering the world of Epictetus.” He didn’t mean that he was attending a philosophy seminar. He knew what he was to force when he crash-landed. He knew it wouldn’t be easy to survive.
Interviewed by Jim Collins for the business classic Good to Great, Stockdale explained there was one group that had the most trouble in the prison. “It was the optimists,” he said, “… the ones who said, ‘We’re going to be out by Christmas.’ And Christmas would come, and Christmas would go. Then they’d say, ‘We’re going to be out by Easter.’ And Easter would come, and Easter would go. And then Thanksgiving, and then it would be Christmas again. And they died of a broken heart.”
But Stockdale persevered and did make it out. He quenched his desires and focused exclusively on what he did control: himself.
* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman