Just as when meat or other foods are set before us we think, this is a dead fish, a dead bird or pig; and also, this fine wine is only the juice of a bunch of grapes, this purple-edged robe just sheep’s wool dyed in a bit of blood from a shellfish; or of sex, that it is only rubbing private parts together followed by a spasmic discharge—in the same way our impressions grab actual events and permeate them, so we see them as they really are.
—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 6.13

There is one Stoic exercise that might well be described as contemptuous expressions. Stoics use an almost cynical language as a way to dismantle some of the fanciest or most coveted parts of life. Marcus‘s joke about sex—why would he say something like that? Well, if you take a second to consider sex in such an absurd light, you may be less likely to do something shameful or embarrassing in the pursuit of it. It’s a counterbalance to the natural bias we have toward something that feels really good.

We can apply this same way of thinking to a lot of things that people prize. Consider that envy-inducing photo you see on social media—imagine the person painstakingly staging it. What about that job promotion that means so much? Look at the lives of other so-called successful people. Still think it holds magical power? Money, which we want more of and are reluctant to part with—consider how covered in bacteria and filth it is. That beautiful, perfect person you’re admiring from afar? Remember that if they’re single, other people must have dumped them at some point. There must be something wrong with them.

This exercise won’t turn you into a cynic. But it will provide some much-needed objectivity.

* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman

You have been formed of three parts—body, breath, and mind. Of these, the first two are yours insofar as they are only in your care. The third alone is truly yours.
—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 12.3

The body can be ravaged by disease or injured or disabled in a sudden accident. It can be imprisoned or subjected to torture. The breath can suddenly cease because our time has come, or because someone has taken it from us. Breathing can grow labored because of exertion or illness as well. But up until the very end, our mind is ours.

It’s not that the other two parts of life that Marcus mentions—our body and our breath—don’t matter. They’re just less “ours” than our mind. You wouldn’t spend much time fixing up a house that you rent, would you? Our mind is ours—free and clear. Let’s make sure we treat it right.

* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman

These are the characteristics of the rational soul: self-awareness, self-examination, and self-determination. It reaps its own harvest…. It succeeds in its own purpose…
—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 11.1-2

To be rational today, we have to do just three things:

First, we must look inward.
Next, we must examine ourselves critically.
Finally, we must make our own decisions—uninhibited by biases or popular notions.

* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman

When you let your attention slide for a bit, don’t think you will get back a grip on it whenever you wish—instead, bear in mind that because of today’s mistake everything that follows will be necessarily worse…. Is it possible to be free from error? Not by any means, but it is possible to be a person always stretching to avoid error. For we must be content to at least escape a few mistakes by never letting our attention slide.
—Epictetus, Discourses, 4.12.1; 19

Winifred Gallagher, in her book Rapt, quotes David Meyer, a cognitive scientist at the University of Michigan: “Einstein didn’t invent the theory of relativity while he was multitasking at the Swiss patent office.” It came after, when he really had time to focus and study. Attention matters—and in an era in which our attention is being fought for by every new app, website, article, book, tweet, and post, its value has only gone up.

Part of what Epictetus is saying here is that attention is a habit, and that letting your attention slip and wander builds bad habits and enables mistakes.

You’ll never complete all your tasks if you allow yourself to be distracted with every tiny interruption. Your attention is one of your most critical resources. Don’t squander it!

* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman

Here’s a way to think about what the masses regard as being “good” things. If you would first start by setting your mind upon things that are unquestionably good—wisdom, self-control, justice, courage—with this preconception you’ll no longer be able to listen to the popular refrain that there are too many good things to experience in a lifetime.
—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 5.12

Is it that controversial to say that there are the things that people value (and pressure you to value as well)—and there are the things that are actually good? Or to question whether wealth and fame are all they are cracked up to be? As Seneca observed in one of his plays:

“If only the hearts of the wealthy were opened to all!
How great the fears high fortune stirs up within them.”

For centuries, people have assumed that wealth would be a wonderful cure-all for their unhappiness or problems. Why else would they have worked so hard for it? But when people actually acquired the money and status they craved, they discovered it wasn’t quite what they had hoped. The same is true of so many things we covet without really thinking.

On the other hand, the “good” that the Stoics advocate is simpler and more straightforward: wisdom, self-control, justice, courage. No one who achieves these quiet virtues experiences buyer’s remorse.

* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman

Epictetus says we must discover the missing art of assent and pay special attention to the sphere of our impulses—that they are subject to reservation, to the common good, and that they are in proportion to actual worth.
—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 11.37

Here we have the emperor, the most powerful man in the world, quoting in his diary the wisdom of a former slave (and from what we know, Marcus might have had direct notes from Epictetus‘s lectures via one of his former students). That wisdom was ultimately about surrender and serving the common good—about the limits of our power and the importance of checking our impulses—something every person in authority needs to hear.

Power and powerlessness seem so rarely to enter the same orbit—but when they do it can change the world. Think about President Abraham Lincoln meeting with, corresponding with, and learning from Frederick Douglass, another former slave of considerable wisdom and insight.

In any case, all those men lived by the principles expressed here: that in our lives—whether we’re experiencing great power or powerlessness—it’s critical to leave room for what may happen and keep the common good and the actual worth of things front and center. And, above all, be willing to learn from anyone and everyone, regardless of their station in life.

* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman

What is bad luck? Opinion. What are conflict, dispute, blame, accusation, irreverence, and frivolity? They are all opinions, and more than that, they are opinions that lie outside of our own reasoned choice, presented as if they were good or evil. Let a person shift their opinions only to what belongs in the field of their own choice, and I guarantee that person will have peace of mind, whatever is happening around them.
—Epictetus, Discourses, 3.3.18b-19

Opinions. Everyone’s got one.

Think about all the opinions you have: about whether today’s weather is convenient, about what liberals and conservatives believe, about whether so-and-so’s remark is rude or not, about whether you’re successful (or not), and on and on. We’re constantly looking at the world around us and putting our opinion on top of it. And our opinion is often shaped by dogma (religious or cultural), entitlements, expectations, and in some cases, ignorance.

No wonder we feel upset and angry so often! But what if we let these opinions go? Let’s try weeding (ekkoptein; cutting or knocking out) them out of our lives so that things simply are. Not good or bad, not colored with opinion or judgment. Just are.

* Source: The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman